We live in a time when life seems to
happen at the speed of light. We are bombarded with so much information,
so many demands, increasing expectations, tighter deadlines,
more physical resources to choose from, yet much less social
and emotional support. We experience a sense of living in isolation,
feeling alone with all we must bear; even when we may be married,
have a family, friends, a workplace with colleagues and live
in cities surrounded by many thousands of people.
It is a great irony of our times that
we should feel so alone and so tired, without energy, when, in
our hemisphere, we are surrounded by more people and more resources
than at any other times in the history of mankind. I have often
stopped to reflect on this situation and felt a deep sadness.
What has happened to us? What have we come to create in the illusion
that we could make life better and easier for ourselves?
My quest for some answers has been
a long process. I have been blessed by a life enriched by many
experiences, but also the benefit of the experiences of thousands
of wonderful people I have been privileged to assist with a wide
range of life problems. I have felt humbled by the simplicity
of the very basic nature of our ills and pains. We have lost
touch with our most inner-self. Stuck in our head space, we have
lost touch with our "heart and soul", and with each
other's "heart and soul". The solution always lies
within each of ourselves, one moment of attention away.
We seem to "feel" proud and
most productive - on top of the world - when we engage more and
more activities, our heads spinning in a whirlwind of thoughts,
ideas, choices and plans. We put so much energy into trying to
take control of our lives and the world around us. The more we
can do and gain, the bigger we "feel".
Unfortunately, it is at my door that
I welcome many of the human casualties of choosing to live at
the speed of light and become bigger and bigger. When the wheels
of the mind spin too fast, disconnected from heart and soul,
the body can't keep up and starts to show signs of fatigue and
dis-ease. Anxiety, depression, anger, pain, fear are all signs
that we need to slow down and start to pay attention. Yet, we
are socially encouraged to swallow back our ills, take a pill
and go on. We fear that if we stop to care for a moment, some
tragic happening may destroy our life and all that we build within
that life. In truth, if we don't stop to listen and care, this
is when we really put ourselves in danger. A failure to stop
may mean our pre-mature death or a serious illness that will
dramatically alter life for us and those we love and assume responsibility
for.
This doesn't mean that we can't find
energy to do a lot with our lives, but we need to learn to anchor
ourselves more effectively in our inner-truth and source of energy,
make the loving choices as I like to call them. We need to align
our life choices with what is in our heart and soul, rather than
be so concerned with the external expectations and benefits.
When we have been socially conditioned
to go on and on, meeting external expectations and focusing on
the material rewards and benefits of our choices, it is very
difficult to slow down, or know to do any different. We are often
not even aware that life can be experienced differently. A reduction
in what we do and produce, earn and build, is often experienced
as a great threat to ego. Change is a very scary experience for
our ego self, so we may choose to believe in and stay with what
we know. We get stuck in our fears: "What will happen to
our standard of living, our security and our status in life?
What will other people think? How will we be judged for slowing
down or making a change with our life?" We fear loosing
the stuff we have come to value because we have so little else
in our lives. We fear loosing approval and love from those we
have become emotionally dependent upon. We fear that the world
can't go on if we are not contributing all that we do or maybe
fear to face how the world would actually go on without us. All
those fears, and many more, become a major block that slows us
down and impedes our ability to truly produce and perform at
our best. All those fears prevent us from listening to our deeper
self, the place in our heart that seems to know how to best care
for ourselves and for the world we live in. It is not easy to
quiet down all of the noise made by our ego self to focus on
the more subtle voices of our heartfelt self. In fact, many of
us have never learned how to connect and make sense of the world
of feelings that lies deep in our heart and soul. We know we
have feelings, but we often learned to stuff them, ignore them,
or vent them out like garbage we dump on other people we believe
to be the source of our ills. Most of us have learned to fear
our emotions and can't make any sense of such experiences; much
less know how to manage such a precious gift in a manner that
helps guide and energize our lives in the direction of our fulfilled
and happy selves.
Take a moment to consider where you
are at and how good you are at listening and learning from your
inner-self, your heart and soul.
Slow down, simplify, keep your life
in alignment with your inner truth and learn to create a full
and satisfying life and career for yourself.
Love and live well!
Susie Legault
Chartered Psychologist
Email: legaultsusie@shaw.ca
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